Diwali is the Hindu festival of lights. Diyas are lit and firecrackers light the sky. The excitement builds and everyone turns into children again waiting, wanting, the bangs, pops, and cracks of crackers. Ceremonies are held, prayers are said and red strings are tied on wrists.
The last time I was here in India was Diwali, 2008, but for me it was long. I woke up in pain, as I did most of that trip, and as I remember I ended up bawling my eyes out when Dr. Geeta came for rounds. The pain plus the fact it was that time of month and the emotions from the stem cells were all just too much. I was a wreck. That day the prescription for me was primrose oil and lots of chocolate. Dr. Geeta actually had one of the doctors go out and get me chocolate. “We are having a celebration downstairs and we want all the patients to join us”, she told me. I sucked up my bad day and went down to the lobby with all the other patients not knowing quite what to expect.
This Diwali, 2009, I knew what to expect and I couldn’t wait. At the hospital the prayer ceremony was held a day before for the patients and staff. Everyone gathered in the lobby. The female staff dressed in beautiful saris and suits. This year I wore an Indian suit too, which is a tunic, pants, and a scarf, for the ceremony. The prayer was for prosperity for the hospital and patients. Hindu or not we were all blessed and received orange on our foreheads and a red string was wrapped around each of our wrists. The red string I had worn from last year had fallen off just days before my trip back to India began and I missed it. For me I wear my red string with pride, knowing it not only carries a prayer but it is my reminder everyday of where I have been. It carries the memories and love from the hospital and all the people I’ve met on my journeys here. That’s what I love about India, the people enjoy sharing their culture and traditions.
In my room, the night before Diwali, the focus was drawn away from the upcoming festivities. My lower back, just a strip, had a warm sensation. My mom put her hand on the spot, it was warm to the touch too. I sat down unsure of what the warmth meant for almost in the center was the site of my procedure 5 days before. The feeling of warmth spread up my spine as if from the inside. I felt the warmth move each individual vertebra from the bottom up. Subtle adjustments, not pain, just a feeling of each one tipping slightly as if my spine were realigning. “Mom something is happening it’s… weird,” I say “it’s kind of freaky.” Her face is confused and needing more description than freaky or weird. Retracing? The feeling settled in my right shoulder blade as I went to sleep. “Midnight it’s Diwali”, my mom whispered with a smile as she wrote down my newest change.
The morning of Diwali I woke up excited about the nights festivities. It was the first day of the five-day festival and surly the loudest day. Through out the day I got a feeling of my ribs closing around my organs. My breath shortened from the awkward feeling. I could breath fine but my lungs felt cramped as what felt like realigning continued. It was the second or third time this Diwali day I had this feeling. I got up from bed once it subsided. My mom looked concerned but it was time for all of Delhi to explode in crackers, Nu Tech included, as they lit up the sky and their cracks echoed from all around. It’s something about the noise they like here, not so much the pretty colors but defiantly something one cannot miss. What ever it was, the sensation I had been having all day, would have to wait it was time for the crackers. This year I wasn’t missing them, I went outside with the other patients to watch, it was well worth it.
Elaine In India 
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